Personalized
.... lining us up with tailor-made circumstances that help us see and unmistakably Know again, even if only for a moment.
Yet impersonal
... not offering prizes or punishments, gifts or challenges; as any indication of good, bad or of worthiness. It's not out to get any one of us more than the other. It wants all of us to learn and unlearn, whatever it is that serves evolution of consciousness.
I hate and love it.
Hate the frustration of repeating patterns... often feeling like the brunt of a cosmic joke and only sometimes appreciating the humor in it.
Love parts of experiencing through the flesh: The flood of adoration for and connection with my boy. The joy of movement and dance. The deep down connection that can be felt through the simple meeting of eyes. Knowing One from the place of many.
Ain't nothing like it.
And... there are times I am like, F this. I "no thank you" life right now and would rather not take part.
The unfolding of life though, the expression of Consciousness; can neither be stopped nor contained. Though it's kind enough to contain us, giving us both our content and context. And we may also choose to pause and witness being alive in it.
We can absolutely attempt to step away from It, stepping in stride toward fragmentation within. Dizzying ourselves until we forget that which holds us, breathes us, is us.
And I do that.
More often than not.
When I realign with Knowing though, I forget the goodness and the badness of it all, feel love and hurt both born of the same tender... feel the self and all that I fight against as the same things that have brought me here. When I go deeper into our substance, I remember the Same that joins us all. Neither created nor destroyed, problematic nor resolving... Alive as me and alive as you... simply ALIVE, here.
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